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“She can always say she's busy if she's uncomfortable, but at least you've done the right thing by inviting her,” says Spira.

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“You don't know who will see that and it could lead to some nasty postings on your wall,” he says.

Instead, personally tell a few close friends and then let the grapevine do its work.

“Expect a very angry, jealous response,” predicts Yahoo's mental health expert Rob Dobrenski, Ph. “Don't go in with the idea of defending what you did because that says to your friend 'You're not allowed to feel what you're feeling right now.' But if you let your friend have her say, she may come around at some point.”Follow your friend's lead As the wounded party in this situation, your pal (if she remains one) gets to set the tone for how friendly she wants to still be with you…

and how much she wants to see and hear about you as a couple.

“If you're breaking this taboo, you're going to have to acquiesce to your friend's comfort level to try to salvage your friendship,” says Paz.

That said, the best way to show that you still want to be a friend is to spend time with her one-on-one and continue to include her in group gatherings even if her ex, your new beau, will be there, too.But if you continue to feel frozen out, spend time with friends who support you and seek out some new friends who don't know your backstory.Don't share relationship details with her You may have shared the minutiae of your past relationships with your gal pal, from the weird way the last guy you dated chewed his food to that thing he did with his hips that drove you wild.After all, it's one thing if he was your friend's college flame and you bump into him 10 years later in an Italian cooking class and bond over lasagna.It's quite another if he dumped her last weekend and wants to hook up with you now.“There has to be more than the thrill of the drama because eventually that will fizzle out,” says Lisa Paz, Ph. Question his motives Even mind-blowing sex ultimately isn't worth sacrificing a friendship, so make sure you and Mr.

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